Disclaimer: Don't own GW
Pairings: 1xH, 2x5/5x2
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"I mean, the guy hasn’t taken a vacation in his whole life! He’s been going full steam since the day he was born. His body was bound to shut down on him sooner or later," Duo says. I nod my head in agreement as I drop a chamomile tea bag into a mug decorated with dancing bears.
"At least it wasn’t a nervous breakdown," Wufei mutters.
"Wufei, be nice! Sometimes Quatre just thinks too much. It’s not his fault, it’s just the way he is," I protest, sticking up for the ex-Gundam pilot. "Besides, it’s not fair to pick on someone when they aren’t here to defend themselves. It’s not very honorable." He grumbles and I try to hide my smile. Caught in his own trap.
"He’s all sorted out now. And he’s got Trowa to keep an eye on him," Duo adds.
"So how long do you think Heero’s going to be on ‘vacation’?" Wufei asks.
"I dunno. I can’t believe he actually collapsed during a diplomatic meeting. It must have been pretty embarrassing for him and Relena. He is her body guard," Duo laughs.
"I think it’s going to be a while. He was under observation at the hospital for almost three days. I think they wanted to keep him there longer, but he wouldn’t cooperate," I state.
"That’s Heero for ya. As dumb and as stubborn as a mule," Duo sighs.
"You think he’s dumb?" I pout. "I think he’s pretty smart." Duo’s face splits into a sly grin.
"I think someone has a crush on the Prefect Solider. And this time it’s not me!" he says in a singsong voice. My cheeks get red hot.
"So?!" I shout. Wow real tactful, Hilde dear.
"You’ve got your work cut out for you," Wufei says dryly.
"Yeah really! If I’m bisexual, Wufei’s homosexual, and you’re heterosexual then Heero must be…nosexual!" Duo crows.
"Just because he didn’t fall for you, Duo Maxwell, doesn’t mean he won’t fall for me! I’ve got a lot more to offer!" I retort childishly.
"Oh yeah? Like what?" he challenges. I think for a minute and then stick my chest out. I laugh as his face falls slack, stumped. I catch the brief grin that flits across Wufei’s face and feel I’ve won a minor victory.
"I’m going to bring this tea up to Mr. Nosexual right now," I say and sway my hips as I leave the kitchen.
I walk up the stairs, thinking about what Duo and Wufei said. I’ve had a crush on Heero a long time, but it’s like I don’t even exist to him. I’m just Duo’s friend. Duo’s ex-girlfriend. Duo’s business partner. I’m nothing on my own. But seeing how Duo got Wufei to warm up to him gives me a little hope. I remember when Duo told me he was bi and that he had a crush on Wufei. He said he wouldn’t mind having both a girlfriend and a boyfriend, and Wufei was so head-over-heels in love that he agreed to anything Duo wanted. But I wasn’t too comfortable with the idea. And besides, I was more in love with Heero than Duo. It’s true what they say about opposites attracting. I don’t know any other way to explain my attraction to him - or Duo and Wufei’s attraction for that matter.
I knock softly on the door and turn the handle. The blinds are drawn over the window, keeping out the early morning sun, and the ceiling fan spins lazily around and around. Heero’s form is spread haphazardly on the bed, one arm lying over his face and his legs tangled in the blankets.
"What do you want?" he rasps, making me jump and causing hot tea to spill all over my hand. I hiss and quickly set the mug down on the nightstand, wiping my hand with the sleeve of my shirt.
"You startled me! I thought you were asleep!" I laugh, settling my nerves.
"What do you want?"
"I-I brought you some tea…it will settle your stomach," I stammer, thrown by his harsh tone. I shrug it off. He’s just crabby because he’s sick. "I also wanted to tell you we’re all going to be leaving soon for work. Here’s our numbers," I say, putting a slip of paper under the phone by his bed. "Okay?"
"Hn."
"Okay. See you tonight," I say and close the door behind me. In the hall I run into Duo. "I hate to leave him alone when he’s so sick. Ya know?" Duo sighs at the closed door.
"Yeah. Why don’t you stay here with him?"
"Naw, I can’t. I’ve got too much to do at the salvage yard. Hey…"
"What?" I ask, alarmed by the look in Duo’s eyes.
"Why don’t you stay with him?"
"Me?!"
"Yeah! You’re the one with the hots for him! Maybe he’ll fall in love with you. That whole weird patient-falls-in-love-with-nurse-syndrome thing."
"Duo!"
"Hey, it could happen! Plus there’s not that much work. I can get it done without you."
"Oh all right…but only because he can’t take care of himself!"
"Sure thing babe," he says and winks at me.
*
"What are you still doing here?"
I turn to see Heero standing in the doorway of the den. He looks terrible. His hair is greasy and matted to his forehead. His face glistens with sweat and his eyes are dark and sunken against his pale skin. He holds on to the doorframe, his shoulders drooping and his head hanging forward.
"Duo thought someone should stay with you," I explain as I watch him shuffle over to the armchair across from me. He looks old as he sinks down into the chair. I notice wet streaks down the front and back of his shirt. His fever must be getting worse. He looks at me like a scientist looks at a specimen under a microscope. I resist the urge to fidget. "Ah…do you want something to drink? Are you hungry?" I say after a few minutes, feeling extremely uncomfortable.
"Some water. Please," he says as an afterthought. I leave the paperwork I have been doing on the couch and walk into the kitchen. The sink faces the den and my eyes seem glued to the back of his chair as I fill the glass, as if I was expecting something incredible to happen. Of course nothing does, and I walk back in and hand him the glass. I return to my spot and watch as he lifts it to his lips, his hand shaking badly. He takes only a small sip, then leans forward and places it on the coffee table. He looks up and meets my eyes and I quickly look down at my paperwork, hoping that I’m not blushing as much as it feels like I am. I can still feel his eyes on me as I pick up my pen. My hand brushes the remote control to the TV and I pick it up.
"Want to watch TV?" I ask, offering the remote and hoping he will to fill the silence. He mouths a no thank you and leans back in the chair, closing his eyes.
*
"Hilde, I’m home!" Duo calls, slamming the door and scuffing his feet on the welcome mat. Each noise he makes seems to be loud enough to shake the house compared to the quiet of the afternoon. I look up from my cooking to see Heero retreating back to his room. Duo comes bounding into the kitchen, sticking his nose into everything. "Mmm, what smells so good? How come you’re making dinner? Is Wufei home yet?"
"Duo, please!" I slap his hand as he tries to pick a piece of tomato out of the salad. "I thought since I didn’t work today I’d make dinner. And Wufei must still be at work." He hops over to the fridge and swings it open causing bottles to clink loudly against each other. "Don’t eat anything! You’ll spoil your appetite," I scold, feeling like a soccer mom. He kicks it shut and thankfully saunters out of the kitchen and into the den.
"So how was Heero today?" he asks after putting on some music. I’m glad there’s no hint of anything more than concern for a sick friend in his voice.
"He stayed in his room until about eleven and then came downstairs and slept in the chair for the rest of the day."
"He made it down the stairs? I’m impressed."
"Yeah. He really looks awful."
"Bet that doesn’t matter to you though, does it?"
"I should have known that was coming," I mumble to myself. I hear the door open and shut and then Duo’s excited squeal. I smile, imagining the huge make-out session the two are having in the front hall.
"Smells good, Hilde," Wufei says, appearing in the kitchen.
"Don’t look now but I think there’s a Duo on your back," I kid, the scene of Duo clinging to Wufei too funny. Wufei smiles and shrugs off his Preventer’s jacket, Duo going with it.
"How’s Heero?" Wufei asks, his face suddenly turning all business.
"He looks like a corpse, but I think he’ll make it," I say, trying to lighten up the subject of his suffering health and by the look on Wufei’s face, failing miserably.
*
It’s been about four days that Heero has been staying with us. He’s steadily getting better, but I think it will be a while until he’s totally on his feet again. I watch as he comes through the door, all stooped over like an old man, and sits down in the armchair. Our little afternoon encounters have been a bright spot in my day. When he comes down I don’t feel like I’m intruding on him.
"How are you?" he asks, totally shocking me. Never has he started the conversation.
"Aa…fine. I’m good. How are you?"
"I’m good," he almost whispers. It’s funny how people never say they are feeling bad, even if they are. It seems we always have to put on a brave face.
"Think you’ll make it?" I joke and I am rewarded with a weak laugh.
"I think I’ll pull through."
"Trowa and Quatre say hello and get well," I say, remembering the phone call I had gotten a few minutes earlier. I hope the news will bring another smile to his face.
"That’s good. How’s Quatre?" Darn, no smile.
"He looks very happy. Trowa says he’s making sure Quatre doesn’t work too hard." I quirk an eyebrow as a strange smirk crosses over Heero’s face. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Heero," I scold. He laughs again. Well, now I know he’s not a nosexual.
"I’m sorry. I guess I’m a little too loose."
"No, that’s a good thing. You’ve gotta relax to get better."
"Yeah," he yawns and closes his eyes.
*
I knock on Heero’s door and open it slowly. I hear a moan and see him squint his eyes against the invading light. I close it behind me and let my eyes adjust to the darkness of the room.
"How are you feeling?" I ask softly as I approach his bed.
"Terrible," he croaks. He’s lying on his stomach, half on the bed and half off. The bucket I put by his bed – just in case, as my mother use to say – is filled with vomit.
"Rough night?" I ask sympathetically.
"I feel like I’m dying."
"It can’t be that bad. You’ve never felt worse?"
"Okay, it’s not as bad as when I self-detonated," he says and smiles weakly. "But it’s close."
"Well it can only get better."
"You mean worse. It can only get worse."
"Be optimistic, Heero! Now, do you feel well enough to get cleaned up?"
"I don’t think that’s a good idea."
"Can you survive without the bucket for a few minutes? I’ll dump it for you."
"Yeah. Thanks, Hilde." My heart thumps wildly against my rib cage. He said my name!
PART II
I fumble for the door handle to the bathroom. Finally I get it open and Heero slumps down to the floor, hugging the toilet for dear life as he throws up the piece of dry toast he tried so hard to keep down. His chest heaves, his stomach searching for something else to rid itself of, but finds nothing. I hesitantly reach out and rub his back, hoping to help. I feel his back muscles ripple beneath his shirt. Suddenly a fist flies out and hits me hard in the arm. I jerk back, frightened and hurt. He just hit me. I fight tears. Sure I’ve been hurt physically a lot worse than what just happened, but the shock of Heero hitting me hurt a thousand times more. I step back from him. I just wanted to help you, I want to scream, but I am too afraid to open my mouth. Finally he sits back on the floor, his head in his hands.
"I’m sorry, Hilde. I-I didn’t mean it," the apology is just a whisper, but it’s all that’s needed to fix the situation.
"That’s okay," I say, my voice a little shaky. "It’s like my grandmother use to say. Throwing up is like childbirth. You can only do it alone and people will only get in your way." I laugh weakly, remembering the old saying.
"Yeah," he breathes. "Can you help me up? I don’t think I can do it alone." The past moment of anger and hurt seems silly compared to what he just said. Little by little it has seemed like Heero has opened up to me. He’s admitted when he hasn’t felt well, asked me for things – he’s showed me his weak side. I’m thrilled. I flush the toilet and stoop down to shoulder some of his weight. I pour him a cup of our draining supply of mouthwash and he rinses.
In the kitchen he slowly drains a glass of water down. We move to our ritualistic spots in the den and sit silently.
"Do you want to go back upstairs? Let me help you," I say as I watch Heero struggle to get to his feet. He doesn’t answer me, and I watch as he walks over to the side of the couch I’m not using and sits down in the deep corner. I stare at him as he focuses at some unknown speck by the kitchen doorway, wondering what the action is all about. Is he flirting? Is he delirious? Or was he just uncomfortable? I think perhaps I am reading too much into it, but it seemed so deliberate of a move that it has to mean something. He meets my eyes.
"How long have I been here?" he asks.
"One and a half weeks."
"How long have we known each other?" This question throws me off guard.
"Umm…three and a half years, I’d guess."
"That’s a long time," he says, almost to himself. I’m puzzled by his behavior.
"Do feel better, Heero?" I ask and lay the back of my hand on his forehead. He’s hot, but he doesn’t feel any hotter than the day before.
"Just a little clammy from getting sick to my stomach just now," he says. He takes my hand away from his forehead and intertwines his fingers in mine. Again I stare at him, shocked and baffled, but he returns his gaze to the speck on the wall.
*
"Duo, it was the weirdest thing! I didn’t know what was going on!" I laugh, but inside I’m begging that Duo will help me sort this mess out.
"So let me get this straight. You two just held hands like that for the rest of the afternoon?" Duo asks for the fourth time, tears in his eyes from laughing so hard.
"Yes! What was I supposed to do?" I shout, sending Duo into another laughing fit.
"I don’t know, Hilde. Heero’s a strange guy. Maybe that is his way of telling you he like you! But wait, wait - he wouldn’t look at you, right? Is that what you said?" I sigh, knowing my next words will send Duo into another seizure of laughter.
"Yes, Duo, that is what I said! Are you going to help me or not?"
"Yeah, yeah, sorry. Why don’t you just ask him? Heero’s a direct man. Jeez, every time I tried to flirt with him, he told me to shut up."
"Yeah, but you’re…you," I say, hiding my smirk. I had to say something mean to get him back. He scowls at me.
"Just you remember, Hilde baby, Wufei’s not the only one that has ever fallen for the old Duo Maxwell charm," he says, wagging a finger at me.
"That’s what you think. I was just…relieving stress! It was a stressful war, ya know!" I say smartly. Chalk another one up on the ol’ scoreboard for me.
*
"Are you sure you feel up to this?" I ask, eyeing Heero warily. I’ve heard he’s not one to wait for a full recovery.
"Yes! Let’s go, enough stalling," he demands. I button my jacket and pull on my beret. He opens the front door and we walk out of the house. I lock it behind us, and when I turn around to face Heero, I can’t help but to smile. He looks so…the word that comes to mind is adorable, but it reminds me of kittens and puppies with big bows on them - things that do not really compare to the Perfect Soldier’s non-cuddly personality. But that’s the word that sticks like glue. I made him bundle up in his brown winter jacket, a blue winter hat with a yarn ball on top, a matching scarf, and dark green mittens. With his appearance and the way he’s been "flirting" with me, he reminds me of someone’s childhood romance. Just adorable. Maybe he’s more cuddly than I thought. He looks at me quizzically, but I just shrug and smile wider. We start walking.
"I don’t know why you want to go to the grocery store with me," I say after a while.
"I’ve been in the house for almost three weeks. I need some fresh air, don’t you think?"
"Good point. I would have let you out sooner if it wasn’t so cold," I say and let out a puff of visible breath just to prove my point.
"I’ll remember that for the next time I get sick, Hilde," he says sarcastically. I feel him reach for my hand and I take his. This timid and playful touching has been going on ever since that day on the couch. It’s nice and I’m very happy to know that he might feel the way I do, but the crisp, clean air and the early spring setting is perfect for love and romance. I wriggle out of his grasp and wrap my arm around his waist. It’s like he doesn’t know what to do. He stops, his arm between our bodies. I take it and wrap it around my shoulders. He stiffens and I start walking again. Inside I shout cries of triumph as he relaxes and pulls me closer to him.
*
"Oi, Hilde. Let’s sit down for a while," Heero says as we pass a bus stop bench. I set down the bag of groceries I’ve been carrying on the ground next to Heero’s bag. I sit down next to him and he tentatively wraps his arm around me. I smile and lay my head on his chest.
"I knew you still needed rest," I playfully scold when I realize how out of breath he is.
"I’ll be fine."
"I know." It doesn’t take long before his breathing is back to normal and I sit up. "You ready?" I ask, but really wanting to stay on the bench with him. Now, now, Hilde, you only want to stay here because you’re hoping for a little kiss. I watch him readjust the goofy hat and scarf. He looks at me.
"What?"
"Nothin’," I sigh. His eyes suddenly grow soft and I almost scream with excitement. He’s gonna kiss me! Heero Yuy’s gonna kiss me! We lean in and I close my eyes. When our lips touch it’s so light I almost wonder if we even met at all. But the next second we’ve made full contact. He’s so gentle, nothing like I would have imagined. I imagined this moment to be rough and frightening and exciting all at once, but it’s not. I expected him to brutally kiss me and invade my mouth, but he doesn’t. It’s more passionate than I ever could have imagined. It’s indescribable. When we break both of us are out of breath. He lays his head against my shoulder and I turn my lips to his neck.
"Hilde," he breathes, his voice wavering, "I think I’m in love with you."
PART III
I hear the front door open and shut. I look up at Heero and seeing he’s still asleep I carefully unwrap his arms from around me and get up off the couch.
"Hi, Wufei," I whisper to him in the kitchen. He smiles tiredly and opens the fridge. I pull down a cookbook and thumb through it. "Long day?" I ask, seeing the bottle of beer in front of him as he sits down at the kitchen table.
"Yeah. I don’t want to talk about right now."
"Okay."
"What did you two do today? He looks beat."
"We went to the grocery store."
"That smile on your face…what else happened?"
"Nothin’ much…"
"That’s the same smile I had on my face when Duo told me he was in love with me. Come clean, Hilde."
"Well…you guessed it!"
"I can’t believe it. I’m going to have to hear it right from his mouth before I truly do."
"There are some things that only a woman can do."
"You guys didn’t…you know…"
"No, no! That’s not what I meant. Give me some credit Wufei!"
"Well…he just looks so tired," he shrugs and takes a sip of beer. I hear the front door open and slam shut.
"Hilde, I’m home!"
"Sigh…"
"What? Can’t handle your boy tonight, Wufei?"
"Whatever you did to make Heero sleep like the dead, please share it with me."
"Hey Wu baby!"
"Hi Duo. How was your day?"
"Great! Gimme a kiss!"
"Duo…" We look up as Heero shuffles bleary-eyed into the kitchen.
"Heero, what’s up?"
"I was sleeping…"
"I know, I know – omae o korosu, right?"
"…"
"Sit down, Heero. Relax!"
"Hmm…that’s what I was trying to do when I was sleeping…"
"Well…talk to us! You’ve been here forever and I’ve hardly talked to you!" Duo exclaims and ushers Heero to a chair. Heero stares up at Duo and blinks. "…well how’s everything going? How’s Relena?"
"She’s fine."
"Was she mad at you?"
"I don’t know. I haven’t talked to her since."
"Well! She doesn’t even call to see how you’re doing?"
"She’s a busy woman."
"Think after you’re one hundred percent better you’ll go back to being her bodyguard?"
"…I don’t know. I haven’t thought about that. She’s probably hired someone else…"
"I’m sure she wants you back though."
"I don’t know…" Heero mumbles. His eyes briefly meet mine.
"What was that? That little look there?"
"What look, Duo?" I sputter.
"There’s something going on around here – and I’m going to find out what!" Duo declares. The kitchen is silent except for the sound of my vegetable chopping. Wufei yawns and goes into the den and Duo follows. I smile at sounds of muffled laughter.
"He has a point," Heero says suddenly. I look at him, my smile gone.
"I know."
"I-I’m…" he fidgets. It’s strange to see him squirm. "I’m a solider before I’m anything else."
"The war has been over for a few years, Heero."
"That’s not what I meant."
"I know…I was a solider once upon a time too. I understand."
"No you don’t."
"Yes I do. I’m not going to test your loyalty. You have to do your duty." He nods half-heartedly, his face totally down trodden.
*
I finish up the last of the breakfast dishes and walk upstairs to Heero’s room. The door is open and he’s not there so I breeze by it and head for the closed bathroom door. I listen and hear the shower running. I breathe a sigh of relief. He managed to keep the eggs and toast I made for him down. As I walk downstairs I wring my hands. If he’s better that means he’ll have to leave soon.
*
"Morning, Hilde." I feel Heero’s arms slip around my shoulders and he rests his head on top of mine.
"Good morning. How did you sleep la-"
"I called Relena," he interrupts. Silence follows.
"What did she say?" I ask at last.
"That’s not important. I decided I need to go back."
"I understand."
"Why don’t you come with me?" he pleads.
"I-I can’t. Duo and I run this business together."
"Then why are you never there?"
"I usually am. It’s just…when you got sick…I’ve always cared for you, Heero. And I just wanted to be around you. I wanted to help you."
"…I didn’t know that."
"No…no you didn’t," I laugh, remembering my past encounters with the Perfect Solider.
"Hilde…I don’t know…for the first time in my life I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where I’m going," he says, sitting down next to me at the table. His crosses his arms on the table and lays his head down. The weariness in his shoulders and the defeat in his voice frightens me. I reach over and rub his neck supportively. "Don’t touch me," he snarls. I jerk back.
"Heero, I didn’t mean-"
"Just don’t touch me. Stay away from me," he growls and stands up. The angry look in his blue eyes makes my breath catch in my throat. The statement of hate in his features stabs into me like a knife. He stares at me, drilling holes into my head with his eyes and then suddenly leaves the kitchen. I want to call out to him, but my voice only hiccups in my throat.
PART IV
I sit down in front of the vidphone and take a deep breath. I dial slowly.
"Relena Darlian…Hilde! How is everything? How’s Heero feeling?"
"Heero?! You mean he’s not with you?!"
"No…"
"Oh god, Relena!" All the tears I have kept pent up for the last week come spilling out in the grossest, most embarrassing mess. "He left a week ago. I thought for sure he’d be back with you."
"He’s not here yet. He said he had something to take care of before he came back. Is something else the matter, Hilde?"
"He didn’t tell you?"
"Tell me what?"
"Relena, we’re in love…at least we were in love. I’m still in love with him."
"In love?! What happened?"
"I don’t know. He just got angry with me when I tried to comfort him. He was so upset. He needed to go back and protect you, but he didn’t want to leave…leave me."
"Hilde, I’m so sorry."
"Relena, if he’s not with you and he’s not here, then where else could he have gone?"
"I don’t know."
"I should have known better," I say, suddenly getting angry.
"It’s not your fault. Heero’s just…"
"Heero."
"Yeah. Just remember he hasn’t been shown a lot of love in his life."
"Yeah…yeah, I guess so. Let me know if you see him. I just…I just have to talk to him!"
"I will. Just remember that, Hilde."
"Thanks, Relena." I shut off the vidphone, feeling a little better. It’s nice to talk to another girl for a change. I must have sounded pathetic, getting all whiny and snively over Heero. Pathetic. Still…I hope he’s okay…and I know it will take a long time for me to get over him.
*
"Married?! You two are getting married?!"
"Yep! We’re getting married! M-A-R-R-I-E-D! M-A-R-R-I-E-D! M-A-R-R…" Duo chants. Wufei looks like he’s about to faint and Duo stops in mid-prance. "You okay, baby? You don’t look so good. Come sit down."
"Duo, you weren’t supposed to tell anyone yet," Wufei moans.
"Oops! Yeah but Hilde lives with us!"
"I think I’m going to be sick," Wufei chokes and bolts for the bathroom.
"What’s up with him?" I ask, jerking a thumb in the direction of the bathroom.
"I dunno. He’s the one who proposed."
"He proposed to you? Oh my god Duo, that’s wonderful!"
"Yeah, it was okay. It wasn’t very…romantic...maybe loving is a better word…anyway, I could tell he was trying."
"Tell me!" I gush. Duo smiles.
"He had this little note card and he looked at it and then got down on one knee. Then he looked at it again and said, ‘Duo Maxwell, I love you,’" Duo does his best impression of Wufei in a bad mood. "Okay, so then he had to look at the note card again and said, ‘Would you be my life-partner?’ I almost started laughing. Hearing the words ‘life-partner’ come out of his mouth was too much! And he couldn’t get the ring box open because his hands were shaking so much. I thought he was going to pass out. It was hilarious!"
"Duo!"
"Well it was…"
"So let me see!"
"See what?"
"The ring silly!"
"Oh!" He flaunts the sliver band with three little diamonds imbedded into it in my face. I ooo and ahh. "Wufei has one too."
"Oh Duo I’m so happy for you!" I squeal and give him a big hug. Wufei emerges from the bathroom, extremely pale. "Wufei!" I’m so happy for them I hug him too.
"Please no more," he groans and struggles out of my excited embrace, flopping down on a chair at the kitchen table. I’m so happy, but when I look over at Duo I stop smiling.
"What’s wrong, Duo?"
"No word from Heero yet?"
"No…"
"Oh…well he’s going to be missing the party of his life, ne? The Maxwell-Chang wedding is going to be the wildest wedding ever!" he exclaims, his mask slapped firmly back in place. I thought I was the only one affected, but even Wufei still looks sad after a month of the disappearance of his old comrade.
*
"By the power invested in me by the Earth Sphere I now pronounce you man and…man. You may now kiss the…err…each other," the priest fumbles. The cheering is so loud that it sounds like a rock concert. I can barely hear myself as I hoot at the top of my lungs. The crowd quiets to murmurs of surprise as the newlyweds start get a little hot and heavy at the altar. I laugh as Trowa attempts to separate the still smooching couple. Quatre’s face turns beet red and he squeaks in embarrassment as Wufei’s hand travels down to the front of Duo’s pants. It takes the priest and Trowa to finally break them apart. Duo smiles sheepishly and winks at me. The photographer suddenly pushes me over and hurriedly starts snapping photos. I smile and look out at the wedding setup. It was an outdoor wedding. Everything was perfect. Wufei and Duo both are wearing matching white tuxes that make them look so incredibly sexy that I almost hit myself for not taking Duo up on that little love triangle he offered. Maybe than I wouldn’t be here all alone still thinking about Heero…stop it, Hilde! That was seven months ago! You are not going to ruin the day by thinking about him! I force myself to smile bigger. The weather is gorgeous. The trees are all turning red and orange and big, fluffy clouds hang in sky. The ceremony was sweet, and Wufei managed to make it through without fainting. Actually, it was Duo who paled when the priest said, "’till death do you part." I think it finally dawned on the little player that he wouldn’t be able to flirt with every girl or guy that walked down the street.
*
It started to rain an hour before the reception, but instead of throwing a bad mood on the party, the lightning, thunder, and rain pounding on the glass doors of the banquet hall made the whole thing more exciting. I’m dancing away in the middle of the dance floors. It’s great. I think I’ve switched dance partners four times during this song alone, starting with Quatre and ending up with some cute guy from Wufei’s section of the Preventer’s. I feel the slight buzz of a few drinks and a great meal settled in my stomach and the heavy beat of the base puts me over the top, dancing and laughing with who ever is readily available. The song ends and the DJ says it’s time for the new couple to take the first slow dance. We all make a circle around them and the song starts. The way they hold each other and the stars in their eyes reminds me of…of the end of a romance novel. Yes…nothing more. Something past them catches my eye and I gape in shock. It can’t be. But the two stop dancing, and I know I’m not seeing things. In the background I hear the DJ vainly trying to keep the dance going, but soon no one is paying attention to him and he cuts the song. Everyone’s staring at the sopping wet figure in the doorway. Suddenly the rain is not as invigorating as I thought. He walks slowly towards the now semi-circle of people and to the couple in the middle. He holds out a sagging bouquet of flowers.
"Congratulations."
Neither makes a move to take it. They both stand with fists. Wufei throws the punch I was waiting for. It lands squarely on his jaw, throwing him off balance. He slips on the now wet dance floor, dropping the bouquet and landing hard on his back. He makes no move to get up; his eyes are no longer focused on Wufei. They’re focused on me. But he doesn’t have long to look as Wufei’s suddenly on top of him, mercilessly pounding down. He tries to shield his face, but he doesn’t hit back. Duo stands with his arms folded across his chest, just watching. With what feels like decades but was only moments, a few guys finally decide pry Wufei off. He walks to his seat at the wedding table, his chest heaving and anger still in his eyes. I push my way through the people up to the prone figure on the ground.
"Get up, Heero," I spit. He crawls to his feet and I grab onto his arm and pull him from the banquet hall and out into the lobby. "Were you trying to be dramatic or something by coming here all dressed up in a tux and with a bouquet of flowers?" I demand angrily.
"Yes," he whispers, his eyes at the floor. "And romantic."
"Well you aren’t. You’re just soaking wet and all beat up. God, Heero, you’re a mess," I sigh and drag him into the women’s bathroom. He doesn’t seem to notice, but I could care less. It’s empty. I guess there haven’t been enough drinks around yet. He stands with his hands down at his sides and his eyes still at the floor. He’s a sad sight with his hair all matted down and water still rolling off of him, a downcast statement in his face and blood running from his nose and a split in his lip. "You’re pathetic," I say, totally disgusted.
"I know."
The matter-of-fact way he agrees throws me off guard. Relena’s words come back to me, and I almost tell him I’m sorry, but I can’t, I’m still too angry.
"You really hurt me when you left."
"I know. I’m sorry."
"I don’t think an apology is going to fix everything up this time, Heero."
"I know."
"Well if you know everything tell me why you left."
"I…I…"
"Finally! There’s something the Great Heero Yuy doesn’t know!" I mock in anger, throwing my hands up. He flinches and I slowly lower my hands. "Did you think I was going to hit you?" I ask, my mood totally changed by the small, involuntary action.
"Yes I did, Hilde."
"Why?"
"That’s…that’s what I’ve always known." I don’t know what to say. His straight and honest answers make me realize that what Relena said was more than true, and to a degree that I could never have imagined. Heero turns to the side and muffles a cough in his sleeve.
"You better not be getting sick again, Heero," I threaten. He reaches out and takes my hand, pressing the back of it against his forehead.
"Do I have a fever?" he whispers. It feels good to touch him again. I run my thumb down the side of his face and rest my hand against his cheek. I notice his teeth chattering with cold and the blood that still oozes from his lip.
"Go back to your hotel room and get some rest. You can’t be here," I say and take my hand away from him. He meets my eyes for the first time tonight, the panic and fear of abandonment in them so strong that it makes my own upset over him leaving seem like nothing.
"I’m in love with you, Hilde."
"I know."
"Why won’t you…"
"Call the house tomorrow. You hurt me…I’m not making any promises." He nods slowly, his eyes returned to the floor. I go back to the party.
END.
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